It's a funny thing when we say "I can't do this" whether it's to ourselves or to someone
else. We limit ourselves without realizing we’ve done so. While there are practical
applications to limitations, i.e.. I can't win an arm wrestle with a 200lb man as I’m a
100lb woman (unless of course he just broke his arm and the pain overrides his ability
to win). Most of the time those limitations are self-imposed.
I’ve found myself saying "I can't" with various experiences in my life. From a problem in
rock climbing to finishing the chore of milking 3 goats in full milk to the amount of
pleasure I could feel in my body. What happens now is I still hear the "I can't" and I
counter it with "I can". This opens creativity to solve problems, my grit to push past
limiting pain, and my imagination to see what else I can do.
Now, I’m a quick learner, and while I can do almost anything, it doesn’t mean I want to
do everything. This is where I say "I won't". I won't means this is a hard limit for me, I
may be able to do it; however, it’s not something setting my heart at ease once I’m
finished whatever it is. I admit, I am still learning my "I won’ts”, and I do it by
experiencing what I think I can't do until the answer comes to me. “I won't” is a limit--a
boundary, a non-negotiable.
"I don't want to" is feelings based and very likely a feeling you (or I) are trying to avoid
as uncomfortable. "I don't want to wake up early"; "I don't want to exercise"; "I don't
want to jump in the ocean today because I'm feeling low, and I know it will shift my
mood". Usually what follows "I don't want to" is "I'd rather do (insert thing that is
probably not that good for us in the long term)". We don't like being uncomfortable. I get it. What you need to know is there’s learning and growth in the uncomfortable. Either way it goes, you'll learn something about yourself in the process.
So get out there, get uncomfortable! Show the "I can'ts” exactly what you can do while
respecting the "I won'ts” that come from learning.
We'll see you later...